The Voice of Reason in a World Gone Mad

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Bearish Rationale for Shorting the Market

  1. + Europe is about to enter contagion phase, with Spain standing at-the-ready;
  2. + The most widely-followed stocks have gone nothing short of parabolic;
  3. + The United States has a debt that will crush it, sweeping away its present form;
  4. + The unemployment situation is much worse than the government is letting on, and critically-needed tax revenue can't be faked and redefined by the Feds like the BLS numbers can;
  5. + Sentiment is at historically bullish levels;
  6. + Any rational person looking at a long-term chart of the market knows it's phenomenally overpriced;
  7. + The excesses of the 1990s have been papered over and not legitimately addressed.

Bullish Rationale for Buying the Market

  1. + End-of-quarter window-dressing, because everyone knows AAPL at $620 is a fantastic bargain.
  2. + That traitorous scumbag Bernanke will never stray from his dual mandate, which is to (a) sacrifice the future of the U.S. for the ceaseless avarice of his friends; (b) assure his own future's financial fortune at Goldman.
  3. + Facebook, ba-bee!