Stick a Fork In It

By -

As regular readers know, even family travel does not prevent me from doing multiple posts in short spans of time. I'm literally at the gate of the airport with Mrs. Bear and my cubs, heading to the land of Dopey, Grumpy, and Wheezy, but I can't leave my readers high and dry.

{Update: I typed the above at 8:45 p.m. and my 12 seconds of battery life gave out of me; so here I am, 12:32 in the morning, finishing this oh-so-important update). Anyway.

When we ate at the airport restaurant at SFO, Mrs. Bear noticed the following about out cutlery. See if you can spot what's unusual. I'll bet you can!

0827-fork

Did you guess that one of the items – the knife – was made of plastic instead of metal? That's right! See? That's why you belong here on Slope.

The logic, I suppose, is that the Federal Government has insisted that restaurants inside the security zone not provide knives to passengers.

Now, if we were talking about steak knives, that makes complete sense to me. Thank you, Washington D.C.! But………..we're not. This is a substitute for a case knife. And – more important – the multiple-sharp-prongs of the fork await the use of anyone with ill intent.

Now, tell me: if you were going to take on someone in a fight, and you could have first choice of weapon – case knife or fork – which would you choose? I would hope the fork. Because, see, a fork can do a fair bit of damage. Eyes, throats, and other squishy parts of the body don't do so well against a fork. Added to which, a case knife can be grabbed with very little risk to the person defending himself.

I cannot be surprised at the logic of an entity that created Cash for Clunkers, gave Henry Paulson a tax-free ride on hundreds of millions of dollars of Goldman Sachs stock, and handed AIG $160 billion as a reward for completely screwing up.

These are the people in charge of your lives.

But at least you're not going to have to stare down some punk-ass terrorist with a case knife. And, with that, I shall rest easier here in the Magic Kingdom.