Oh, Gross……..

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I wouldn’t have ever heard of it, had it not shown up on Twitter’s “Trending” list:

For the more innocent among you, MILF is an acronym for Moms I’d Like to Fuck, which evidently was popularized by the America Pie movie many years ago. I don’t watch television, but I’ve learned that on the 30 Rock show, there was a running gag about introducing a network show called MILF Island which put a bunch of hot woman on an island with 8th graders.

Since life is stranger than fiction, it appears that TLC (which, ironically, is supposed to stand for The Learning Channel) has blatantly stolen this concept, with the only changes being:

  1. It’s called MILF Manor and not MILF Island;
  2. The males are young, healthy studs in their 20s;
  3. The women have, from what I can tell, vastly more mileage than the 30 Rock musings

The titivating teasers have already begun, and the basic setup is that these chiseled young studs are going to bang these cougars, and boy oh boy, isn’t that hot stuff.

Frankly, I think it’s pathetic. This isn’t from some Puritanical point of view. I simply think it’s grotesque that this show is spun as a bunch of middle-aged women “looking for real love” in some McMansion they managed to rent down in Mexico.

There are very few guarantees in life, but I can assure you 100%, absolutely 100%, that absolutely no relationship lasting longer than a couple of weeks will be spawned out of this gaggle of horny young men and very likely mentally-ill cum dumpsters.

Here are a few images of the female participants in this travesty, and keep in mind, this is AFTER professional-level makeup and hair stylists have been involved.

Evidently they line these dreadful shrews up as they hungrily anticipate the sausage fest they’re about to enjoy, and the women eagerly get a first hint as to the carnal bounty they’re about to enjoy by way of these silhouettes:

Which, to my eyes, does nothing but remind me of the climactic final scene of Close Encounters.

I will, of course, not waste a moment of my life with this puerile garbage.

If, however, they did a follow-up show, in which these horny young studs were forcibly paired off, one by one, with these shrieking harridans, making them live with them for a solid year, and they were provided a means to kill themselves out of despondent and abject misery, I’d tune it for that one. Hell, I’d even pay for it.

Here’s the preview; shield your eyes, Frank: