Pizza the Hutt

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In my long life, I’ve never set foot inside a Pizza Hut. If I’m going to consume a high-fat, high-salt, high-calorie pizza, I at least want it to be worth the damage done. I suppose the public feels the same way, since a dozen years have gone by and Pizza Hut hasn’t grown at all.

The parent company, with the misnomer of Yum Brands, has been a powerhouse for decades, although over the past five months YUM has gone basically nowhere.