Revenge of the Nerds

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My despair for the Silicon Valley was ratcheted up another notch this weekend when the Palo Alto Daily Post featured on its top front page the following item:


Apparently, the web site is hosting The American Sugar Daddy Convention (in, all all places, a club named “Pure”, in the not-quite-Sugar-Daddy town of Sunnyvale) at which, bluntly stated, “successful” older men with money (but, it goes without saying, not a lot of charisma) try to hook up with younger women with, I would wager, a combination of self-esteem and “Daddy” issues.

To me, this is just plain pathetic. But the person interviewed for the article actually has to inject hypocrisy into the mix with the following quote:

“Most young women need more than help with the rent or college debts. They also need porkymentoring. Older men can help them write a resume, apply for scholarships, open a brokerage account, or start a business. Younger men not only have no money, they also have no wisdom. An older sugar daddy can enrich a young woman’s life in so many ways.”

Oh, so is that why older men want to get together with younger women? So they can help with with their resume? And apply for a scholarship? And a brokerage account, no less. One can scarcely imagine what kind of business a sugar daddy would want to help his sugar baby start, but I imagine it would involve batteries and optional attachments.

sugar-daddyA cursory examination of the web reveals there are quite a few sites whose sole function is to make a market for horny old guys and scruples-free younger women. Isn’t this charade embarrassing, though? I mean, it seems to me what’s going on here is basically a somewhat longer-term version of prostitution. A man wants to pay for sex; a woman is willing to accept money for sex; bid-a-bang, bid-a-boom, transaction complete, thank you, and good night. But instead of lasting an hour (let’s be generous with our assumptions here, folks), the intent is to last………what…….a few weeks? A few months, maybe? We need to allow enough time for that scholarship application to be tidied up.


I’m not preaching about this from a moralistic standpoint. What men and women choose to do with their moistened folds and stiffened giblets is no concern of mine. I just think it’s a good example of how pervasive this whole “nerds rule the world” schtick has become. Now they can both be richly-paid and get the poontang that has eluded them for so long.

This too shall pass. Get it while you can, boys. It’ll be back to the fleshlight sooner or later, because there isn’t a soul on this earth, from Hugh Hefner on down, who isn’t ultimately disappointed and disillusioned with what he thinks he’s acquired free and clear. And that, my friends, is a beautiful thing.