At 5-8PM Monday through Friday, my landlord shuts off power and water to the building. He tells me it's the "green" thing to do, and it also helps keep my rent down so I should be thankful. I don't mind doing my part to save the environment, but it makes me rush home from work to get my Ramen noodles cooked or I'm screwed for dinner.
Yesterday I took my noodles outside and it wasn't long before neighborhood street dwellers Willy Jaundice and "Stun Gun" Jones came over to ask for help. I offered them my noodles, and they repaid me with a swig of MD 20/20. We were shooting the breeze and Stun Gun started mouthing off about how he made millions on Wall Street. Willy started heckling him, but I started taking notes. Stun Gun rambled off a bunch of numbers and how he predicted the market movements, then he puked up Mad Dog all over my shoes. It looked like I was standing in a puddle of transmission fluid. He ran off screaming that the GS assassins were after him for saying too much, so I went upstairs to change.
When my power came back I took my notes out and here is what I could come up with from his ramblings.
I just looked outside, and Stun Gun is yelling at some pigeons right now. It doesn't look like the assassins got him yet.
