I am a bear. I have six figures in put options. And world markets are collapsing.
That’s where the good news ends.
As a person who can never be happy, let me share the bad news:
- I am 30% in cash
- I had puts in NVDA, NFLX, and a variety of other stocks that are going to get wiped out
- The puts I have have nothing to do with tech, the weakest sector
- My most fervant wish was for a bounce that I could sell into, and that quite clearly isn’t happening.
Thus, although I am virtually assured of massive profits the moment the opening bell rings, those profits will be utterly watered down, and I would be irresponsible to sell into this much weakness. I will almost certainly be “stuck” with way more cash than I wanted, after waiting for the past goddamned two years for the market to get knitting needles shoved into its eyeballs.
I was extremely eager for the markets to open. The moment they did, they gapped down hard, but they started recovering. I was thinking to myself, “Perfect! They’ll rally up to resistance, I’ll deploy all this cash into puts, and it’s show time!”
But, sadly, while I was at a friend’s party……….
……..I kept checking quotes, and the markets were getting absolutely nuked. You would think this would thrill me, but this is NOT what I wanted. I feel completely flat-footed, in spite of having so many bearish positions.
I’m going to curl up with John Oliver and get a good night’s sleep. I fear that when I wake up, we’re going to be crashing, and I’m going to have to make some executive decisions about whether I should take profits, in anticipation of the goddamned Fed stepping in and “saving” the bull bastards.
It’s really quite miserable. I am perfectly poised for profit, but I’m terribly unhappy about what I see. I wish my eyeballs were bleeding from being so short. As it is now, I feel like a repulsive coward.
We are STILL going to get a bounce, but it’s going to be far, far bigger than I had hoped. Brace yourselves, and God help us all.
