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SOH Bailout Drinking Game

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I intend to start a new national craze with the Slope of Hope Bailout Drinking Game. Here we go:

  1. Whenever a politician uses the term "Wall Street" and "Main Street" in the same sentence, take a shot of beer;
  2. If the phrase "preserving the American dream" is uttered, take a shot of beer;
  3. Whenever JP Morgan or Bank of America takes over another failed institution, take two shots of beer (or one shot of the hard liquor of your choice);
  4. If a politician mentions "caps on execution compensation", apologize to the photograph of Hank Paulson on your wall and take three shots of beer;
  5. If President Bush declares that this crisis is no time for "partisan politics", clean your shot glass;
  6. If the Dow Jones net change for the day is up or down triple digits, mix yourself a martini and drink it;
  7. If Gary Savage tries to moderate Tim's trading with cautious admonishments, drink a cup of black coffee;
  8. If Ned does a post, take a bathroom break;
  9. If "progress" or "a breakthrough" on the bailout is announced and, within twelve hours of such announcement, there is still no deal announced, mix yourself a drink with a tiny umbrella in it; remove the umbrella, then consume beverage.

I am, as always, open to further ideas.