As I'm sure most of you are struggling with what to get me for Father's Day, I turn yet again to the SkyMall for some gift ideas. Don't worry; I'll try to act surprised.
First is the Memory Foam Neck Pillow, intended for airline rides. To me, nothing says "condemned" better than this imposing looking brace. It is described as "luxurious" in the copy, although I imagine more color adjectives will spring to mind from my fellow, understandably concerned, passengers.
I'll then arrive in my hotel room, ready to spend my time productively with a laptop or unproductively with a video game. But the room's a bit chilly, and I want don't to wrestle with the nuisance of pushing my hands around the side of a comforting blanket. Breakthrough idea to the rescue! A blanket with holes in it so I can remain both comfortable and stylish.
On my return to home sweet home, I often like to stroll my back yard, which this time of year is bursting with flowers. But who doesn't weary of the same old petals and leaves? I'd like to spice up my garden with something different. A two-foot high Yeti statue fills that bill nicely, thank you.
Never have there been more potent cures for materialism.
