The Big Hair Theory

By -

As the bear market continues to swing its scythe across the idiocy of the past dozen years, one notion I’m glad to see get laid waste is the Crazy Hair Equals Genius theory. I suppose the pop culture notion of Albert Einstein is the foundation for this, but the big winner in this delusion over the past decade was Alex Karp, who usually looked stark raving mad and, thus, was assumed to be a super-genius. As Palantir stock makes plain, however, this has been an unalloyed disaster.

Exhibit A: Alex Karp and His Company
Exhibit B: James Altucher, the “crypto genius”

You see, having crazy, unkempt hair doesn’t mean you’re clever, or that you’re a genius, or that you are too busy making the world a better place to bother with such vanities as shampoo and combs.

It usually just means you’re a self-important, narcissistic douche who is trying to come off as devil-may-care and saucy.

Now that we’ve dispensed with this nonsense, my hat is off (with neatly-coiffed hair beneath, I might add) to a new era of sensible styles instead of fright wigs.