Won’t You Be My Neighbor?

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After reading the “0.1% Problems” post on ZeroHedge (which was about a snippet from a local paper about a fellow complaining that billionaires can get whatever they want, whereas ‘average millionaires’ in Palo Alto cannot), I thought I’d share a property listing with you good people in case you want to join me here in my fair city (my house, mercifully, I bought into back in 1991 when prices were merely above-average, and not insane).

May I present to you 258 Middlefield Road, Palo Alto, California, which is located within walking distance from my house and is a mere $1,800,000 (well, that’s the asking price, but it’ll probably go for more). The property features ample storage in the back……..


A spacious kitchen to prepare everything from snacks-on-the-go to sumptuous Thanksgiving feasts……..


A family room where you may gather with loved ones to share stories from the day, catch up on a good book, or sing around the piano………


A bedroom where you may relax or – heck, it’s Palo Alto! – start the next Google!


Or relax in the well-appointed bathroom featuring running water (and, once the hot water heater has been installed and tested, your choice or either hot or cold)…….


It should be noted that the foundation isn’t absolutely perfect and may require some attention; (please note that a Home Depot is just across the freeway, in colorful East Palo Alto, for all your home improvement requirements….)


Thanks to rock-bottom interest rates, if you’ve got a little over a third of a million dollars saved up for the down payment, and a $300,000 income, you should be good-to-go:


I mentioned the storage, right?

1021-home2 1021-home1

Incidentally, I didn’t do a Google Image search for “hovel” and come up with a fake post. The above pictures are, honest to God, from the real estate listing.

And, in a rare moment of Realtor honesty, I close with this: