Imagine you're a kid again, and this punk classmate – let's call him Jimmy –
terrorizes everyone on the playground. He's not especially big, so
people can pretty much deal with his pranks, taunts, and torments. But
every day, a few minutes before the recess bell, this large high school kid
called Big Ben (whom Jimmy is paying) shows up to beat up anyone Jimmy points out.
On Monday, Jimmy bugs everyone on the playground. They catch him, but Big Ben shows up and punches everyone out.
On Tuesday, a few minutes before the bell, Big Ben shows up again with a baseball bat, sending terrified elementary school kids running for shelter all over the playground.
On Wednesday, Jimmy pours milk down the back of the pretty girl in class. She starts to chase him, but she's apprehended and pushed to the ground by – who else? – Big Ben.
So on Thursday, Jimmy is up to his old tricks. He makes rude noises in class. He drinks milk with a straw stuck up his nose. He shakes his dandruff onto a classmate's project. And he's total brat on the playground. Everyone wants to kill him, but they're too afraid of the consequences.
A few minutes before the end of recess, Jimmy pulls his usual stunts, and the kids have all had enough. They start to chase him, and…………..where's Big Ben? He's leaning against a wall. Everyone freezes and looks at him. Time stands still. And then, with no explanation, Big Ben rolls his eyes, shrugs his shoulders, and walks away from the playground, bored with what he sees.
At which point everyone beats the living hell out of Jimmy.
This, my friends, is what the future holds. Because Big Ben is showing up every single day since bratty little Jimmy needs and is paying for his help. And one day – – – no one knows when, and no one knows why – – but one day, Big Ben isn't going to bother anymore. And when that day comes, Jimmy is heading to the intensive care unit.
And he'll have no idea what just happened.
